Congrats On Your New Job, You Traitorous Bellend

Well, well, well… look who’s abandoning ship. ⚓

Say farewell the Wonky way with our “CONGRATS ON YOUR NEW JOB, YOU TRAITOROUS BELLEND” card  the perfect blend of bitterness and banter for the colleague who’s leaving you to drown in deadlines.

Forget the boring “Good Luck” rubbish this card tells it like it is. Equal parts salty and supportive, it’s ideal for office mates, work besties, or that one co-worker who somehow got promoted while you were busy scrolling memes.

Whether they’re off to chase their dreams, more money, or just better coffee, this card delivers the ultimate parting shot rude enough to make them laugh, honest enough to make HR nervous.

And because we like our insults eco-conscious, every card is printed on plantable seed paper. Once the laughter fades and the tears of betrayal dry, they can plant it in some soil and grow wildflowers a fitting metaphor for starting fresh (and leaving you behind, the bastards). 🌱

So, if you want to say goodbye with a giggle and a middle finger, this card’s the dog’s bollocks.

Please Note

The colours you see online may exhibit slight variations compared to the actual printed product. Since computer monitors and phone screens can display colours differently, please bear this in mind when reviewing your design.

Furthermore, all our cards are printed on seed paper, adding an eco-friendly touch to your message. These cards can be easily planted, and you’ll find instructions on how to grow these little beauties right on the back of the card.

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